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Oh, shirt, how you mock me

July 29th, 2008 | daily drama

I got the Lightening Online teeshirt. I implored to you talk some sense into me about the contest I was planning. And then poop happened.

Poop meaning moving stuff.

And rain and cloudy skies. And sorry, but it was crazy enough that I was going to do the half naked show in the sun, I’m definitely not doing it on a virtually hottie-less beach when it’s 15 degrees and cloudy. But I did still get all whorey-looking. Just for yous.

I could still go through with the contest, but that would mean holding onto the shirt for even longer, and that’s just not fair, considering that it will lower the number of potential contestants for the end-of-year prize.

[For the record, my boobs normally look way better than that. Ahem.]

So here’s the deal, yo. You leave me a comment with your bestest answers to the following. Each response will be scored on a 1-5 scale, giving a final score for each entry. Answers will be scored based on wit, calculated cruelty, blunt and self-esteem-damaging honesty, creativity and the always important compliment factor.

I’ll announce the winner and post the final scores when I have internet service again – likely on the evening of the 31st. The winner takes the shirt and the next top three will get a special pressie from me. If you don’t want the shirt, still enter and let me know cuz I will totally send you something good* if you win.

Your questions (blanks can be filled in with as many damn words as you want):

  1. Zoeyjane ___________________ too much.
  2. Isobel is the __________________________.
  3. Moving sucks ________________________.
  4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would _______________________________.
  5. I write a blog. This means I’m ____________________.

* Hint, hint: it may have something to do with being naked.

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  • Thanks for the informative post.. and thanks for adding our comment to the blog. I am subscribing to your feed so I don\'t miss the next post!
  • Ah, well. Maybe with some other shirt, some other time. LOL

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  • Im not playing cuz I missed the boat, but I just had to say that dude, your hair looks effing dope in that picture.

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    2. Isobel is the shit.
    3. Moving sucks hairy, apricot sized gorilla balls.
    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would make sure my babies were taken care of.
    5. I write a blog. This means I’m a narcissistic asshole and I love myself for it.

    Now gimmie. OMNOMNOM!

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  • Zoeyjane ____has perfect boobs_______________ too much.
    Isobel is the __shiznaz AND a bag of chips________________________.
    Moving sucks ___like Epson sucks ink.
    If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would __spend a million dollars in 30 days_____________________________.
    I write a blog. This means I’m ________a bloggeress________.

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  • 1. Zoeyjane drinks coffee too much. (nice sentence structure, i know)
    2. Isobel is the next generation of sassy confident women.
    3. Moving sucks short term, but pays off long term.
    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would spend every fucking penny of it before i died. mostly in las vegas with my friends.
    5. I write a blog. This means I’m desperate for attention and validation for my life decisions. and passive aggressive. no really. i am.

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    Isobel is the cutest kid ever -- with the exception of my own exceedingly beautiful chlld(ren).
    Moving sucks rocks. and it sucks eggs. and donkey balls. sweaty donkey balls in fact. BIG sweaty donkey balls even.
    If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would tell my boss to fuck off and take my husband and kids on a round-the-world trip.
    I write a blog. This means I’m emotionally incontinent.

    heh

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  • Zoeyjane doubts herself too much.
    Isobel is the cutest creation you could have possibly made. And even though i've never had the pleasure of meeting her, I feel like I have. and thats rad.
    Moving sucks more then the cum guzzeling whore my ex is seeing. bitch.
    If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would give post dated cheques for my rent, sell everything I have and travel to as many places as i could with my three best friends. and probably only eat meals that revolve around cheese and drink red wine. and ceasars.
    I write a blog. This means I get to stalk people on stat counter.

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  • 1st thing's 1st...love the redesign. Awesome with a capital A!

    Now for the business:

    1. Zoeyjane enters my mind, nakedly, too much.
    2. Isobel is the cutest child born to the hottest mom, in the whole wide world.
    3. Moving sucks but it's also a good way to get rid of excess baggage. Also, doing it naked is hot (especially if Z is doing it naked).
    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would buy plane tickets for all my favorite bloggers and we'd PARTAY HARDAY!
    5. I write a blog. This means I’m expressing myself through words and pictures, and sharing myself with many awesome individuals in the blogosphere.
  • 1. Zoeyjane cooks too much.
    2. Isobel is the ShizNit.
    3. Moving sucks Nutty Ass Balls & Limp Peen.
    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would party like a rockstar.
    5. I write a blog. This means I’m a joiner.

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  • I don't know that I could possibly out-do Mr Lady, but here goes anyways...

    Zoeyjane is plagued by her ex too much.
    Isobel is the daughter character.
    Moving sucks donkey dingle.
    If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would have a *lot* of shopping to do.
    I write a blog. This means I’m special. (Ed.)
  • 1. Plurks
    2. glue that keeps mommy from going insane except when she makes mommy insane.
    3. the balls of a 500 pound man in Mexico, in August, who has been outside in 100 (F) degree temps wearing sweatpants.
    4. Go visit ZJ in Vancouver.
    5. considered witty by some and totally fucked by others.

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    2. Isobel is the awesome.
    3. Moving sucks ass when you don't have lick-worthy (single) men doing it all for you...in return for sex. Which, by the way - what's wrong with Canadian men? Here, you'd already have "free movers" if you offered sex...
    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would put it in a fund for my daughter, and then I'm not sure that I'd tell anyone I was dying (afterall, what can they do about it but worry?), but I'd definitely spend lots of time with everyone I love, including you.
    5. I write a blog. This means I’m probably neglecting my husband or home as we talk. Oh, wait I didn't mean choose one, that was more of an "and"/both situation.

    PS - You rock my socks off, but I want not the tshirt. Love you!

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    2. Isobel is the reason my husband won't agree to get a motherfucking vasectomy anymore, thankyouverymuch Isobel.
    3. Moving sucks my dick, and made me have ribs remove so it could bend over and get to my dick all by itself, which ALSO sucked. My dick.
    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would die in a month.
    5. I write a blog. This means I’m surrounded in laundry and wondering where all these flys have come from.

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  • I can't do the whole t-shirt thing, but I love the picture - super cute hair!!

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    Isobel is the best Princess out there, next to Princess Leia of course.

    Moving sucks so hard when you dont have a double caesar, extra spicy. Or ten.

    If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would fly all my girls (and guy) to a tropical island and I would do completely inappropriate (and borderline illegal) things to them and with them.

    I write a blog. This means I'm so freaking awesome that people actually read it when I write pointless, helpless, nonsense.

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    2. Isobel is the nommiest DeBaby ever.

    3. Moving sucks moldy sweaty 27-year-old goat balls.

    4. If I won a million dollars on the same day I found out I was going to die in a month, I would finally go to Canada. Hire a babysitter for Is, kidnap you and we'd be headed to Greece. For a while. There would be alcohol involved. And shopping. And gratuitous sex with strange but super-hot men. And then we'd buy Jason Mraz.

    5. I write a blog. This means I’m the Chuck Norris of the Intarwebz.

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