I am a Ten-Toed Sloth. Or Not.

Posted on June 19, 2008
Filed Under confessions of a confessaholic, daily drama |

Sloth: Aversion to work or exertion; laziness; indolence.

Yup. Except nope. There’s a very good reason that bipolars used to be called manics, which used to be referred to as split-personalities. We’re two different people sometimes. We’re two different people at the same time, sometimes. Sloth and I go way back. But Sloth and me? We hardly know each other. Confused?

Manic Zoeyjane: Has drive to clean-tidy-wash-trash-organize. OCD Zoeyjane feeds this. ADD Zoeyjane makes it hard to finish one task without starting another, leaving 21 unfinished jobs, including four different piles, lying around.

Not Manic Zoeyjane: Happy enough if Isobel has clean sippy cups and clothes. Does laundry on an as-needed basis. Does everything on an as-needed basis. Sleep is more of a priority over showering, cleaning or anything requiring her to move, much.

So, imagine what it’s like when Manic and Not Manic Zoeyjane both come out in the same timespan. I end up with piles on my floors of things to throw out and organize and then I go take a nap.

I’ve got some serious extremism issues as far as motivation goes, but I’m working on them. I’m making some things routine and that makes a huge difference. Then, during the times when I’d normally just sit and vegetate on the intarwebz, I’m trying to tackle one thing that I’ve let go for an embarrassingly long time.

So, here’s Not Very Manic Zoeyjane’s typical Sloth-filled day:

  1. Wake up whenever the kiddo does, to the sound of “Mama! Ah gotta get ooowt! Maaaaamaaaaaa! Monkey. Monkey, Dog. Book. Weed book?” from her bedroom. Go smoke.
  2. Turn on television immediately, after Isobel picks the ‘moobie’ to watch. Suffer through the sounds of another rendition of Rugrats or Dora, while perched at the desk, checking email, feed reader and drinking coffee.
  3. At some point, think, ‘I guess food is in order’ and attend to it. Shortly thereafter, think, ‘I guess a new diaper is needed’ and attack-change Isobel.
  4. About 10 minutes before wanting to leave - usually when the reader is empty or uninteresting - get clothes, snacks, etc together and slam into productive mode. Chase toddler with shirt and pants, while she runs away with my bra over her head and a pile of Dora ugh, panties clutched in her arms.
  5. Walk outside with Isobel (miss the stroller). Chase after her again, or stand in the middle of the sidewalk, asking her to please move her ass (not in those words). Eventually, end up carrying her.
  6. Once home from the morning activities, scrounge up some form of lunch (yes, crackers and cheese, again, with an apple sauce on the side) and then pray for a smooth naptime. While filling up the sink with dishes to be washed.
  7. Put child in sleeping receptacle. Wash dishes amongst nap time outrage/docility/effectiveness. Sweep up cracker crumbs and eat leftover cheese. Catch up on feed reader/Twitter. Then do something that’s been put off, forever. (Today was finally calling about my student loan from 2001. That I never borrowed. That I’ve not made a payment on and have been collecting interest at $178 a month for.)
  8. Kiddo wakes up/quiet time is over. Shove snacks in her general direction while getting ready for another outside excursion. Miss the stroller while running errands, at the beach, library or park.
  9. Make dinner while getting to listen to yet more Rugrats or Dora. Maybe if I’m lucky, it’s Little People or Alvin and the Chipmunks.
  10. Dinner and brief clean up are followed by a few stories or flash cards or puzzles or more sitting while the movie continues. *Shrug*
  11. Child in bed. It’d be nice if she was asleep since this is when I’m on msn blogging watching miscellany on youtube binging on the foods i hide from her doing laundry and cleaning. Maybe after doing that, I’ll watch a movie, but most likely, I’ve wasted so much time, there’s little of it left in the day. Which means putting on some flannel and climbing into my bed with a book.
  12. Pick up the dirty dishes, snacks, etc. in the morning on the way into the baby’s room.

See? Not Very Manic Zoeyjane gets some shit done. But for the most part, is too attached to her computer.

Manic Zoeyjane would have done the dishes while the first episode of Dora was playing, drinking her coffee at the same time. And brought laundry down when leaving for the morning activity and popped it into the washer upon returning.

When Isobel went for her nap, MZ would’ve switched the laundry into the dryer, cleaned the bathtub, mopped the floor and then checked the feed reader. After dinner, Isobel would have taken a bath while the rest of the bathroom was cleaned and then after bedtime, a new crocheting project would have been started after two or three blog posts were drafted, email was cleaned out and the feed reader was clear.

Manic Zoeyjane makes Not Very Manic Zoeyjane tired and anxious and in need of a rest. Just what Not Very Manic Zoeyjane has earned, right?

[if you want to read more of my sin posts, go here for Lust, Vanity, Wrath, Gluttony and Greed, and Envy]

Probably just as moody:

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  2. Chchchchanges It never occurred to me that having JDawg here might cause weirdness past the old issues. But here’s the thing:...
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Comments

11 Responses to “I am a Ten-Toed Sloth. Or Not.”

  1. Eve Grey on June 19th, 2008 6:08 am

    I love sloths. Sloths are cute.

  2. Lunanik on June 19th, 2008 7:17 am

    Manic Zoey is very much like Lunanik after a few too many Red Bulls. Not Very Manic Zoey is like Lunanik on a daily basis. Translation: I need to restock my Red Bull stash so I can get motivated to clean my house.

    Lunanik’s last blog post..I dream

  3. MomBabe on June 19th, 2008 12:30 pm

    That’s MY life. Geez, why do you have to copy everything I do? ugh.

    Now I’m going to lay on the couch and watch Spongebob with the munchkins while glancing at the piles of laundry that are starting to grow arms….

    For the record, I was a very Manic Zoey until I started taking Zoloft. Now I’m very Un-Manic.

    MomBabe’s last blog post..Defining Moments

  4. Tara R. on June 19th, 2008 2:59 pm

    Not Manic Zoey sounds remarkably like T.R. too. I could sit and veg out all day and feel like it was productive if I read those last few chapters of a book or get caught up with my blog reading. That is pretty much what I’ve done all day today….

    Tara R.’s last blog post..Pity Party

  5. soge shirts on June 19th, 2008 3:13 pm

    Sounds like you’re getting a lot done to me. I think I need to be a bit more manic.

    soge shirts’s last blog post..America’s kids are soft

  6. Maria on June 19th, 2008 7:16 pm

    You’re less slothy than I!! Panties. *shudders*

    Maria’s last blog post..The Children of The Fly

  7. Sandy (Momisodes) on June 19th, 2008 7:41 pm

    Your day timeline sounds so much like mine, only we watch different cartoons. I wish I were manic more often. We’d all have clean underwear regularly.

    Sandy (Momisodes)’s last blog post..Life Before Momisodes

  8. Kim on June 20th, 2008 12:44 pm

    I am Manic Zoey 99.9% of the time.. and I hate myself for it. It drives me crazy because I don’t know how to relax anymore.

    Kim’s last blog post..I turned for a second…. again..

  9. ohmommy on June 20th, 2008 6:45 pm

    I need some manic…. my house is filthy.

    ohmommy’s last blog post..Oh. My. Gosh. I am not ready to stop singing.

  10. Mr Lady on June 20th, 2008 9:09 pm

    Manic Zoey makes me hold my breath.

    Mr Lady’s last blog post..Summahtime

  11. Sarah on July 8th, 2008 10:05 pm

    I have 10 toes, too.
    ten toes toes
    that’s fun to say

    Sarah’s last blog post..Growing and Shrinking

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