The old Zoeyjane needs to get out of here. Cuz she helped some shit go down that was not cool and she watched life happen instead of creating the future she wanted. The old Zoeyjane is still sitting here sometimes, saying, “fuck him, fuck this, let’s get even.” But what the old Zoeyjane doesn’t realize is that the new Zoeyjane is more of an asskicker than the old one.
The new Zoeyjane is:
- in charge of her life, mind, future and temper.
- looking forward to being a single parent, because being a dual-parent household meant having two kids and withdrew her attention away from the one that really mattered.
- not afraid of going it alone, even if that means relying on others for help, getting a job (or three), and not visiting Starbucks every day (twice).
- going to quit smoking.
- moving to a smaller, remoter living space. And is happy about it. Even though it looks like financially right now, she might have to live with her mom or a friend for a bit, first.
- not afraid to admit that shit is too hard sometimes. Not that everything surrounding her is out of control, but that controlling everything is impossible.
- not going to let guilt stand in the way of her principals, even if that means doing things the hard way, for everyone.
- going to be more flexible about routine, structure and rules. Heck, if Isobel needs a damn snack at 1am, maybe she’ll get it.
- going to be healthier. Which means sleeping, eating and drinking some freakin’ water. In a non-obsessive way, of course.
- not giving up on the thought of going to school. She just might change her major. Again.
- not going to get into this financial situation, again. She will live within her means, once those means are determined, and will have a back-up plan and savings in place, just in case. And will pay off the damn debts.
- going to get on some shit. Decluttering, remodernizing and cleaning.
- going to have most of her yarn collection used. Soon. Two boxes is too much.
- going to find and be with herself. Not to give her power, self-esteem and moods over to someone else.
- going to start right now.
