See, I made this deal with myself that on Wordless Wednesdays, I would only blog once – the wordless part. On here, anyways. But today, I’m all full of stuff that my fingers are aching to get out and so…though it’s now 9:08pm, I’m could future post for 12:01am. Then it will officially be Thursday. That would also be cheating. So I won’t. Yes, I blog honestly, people.
In point form:
- Isobel’s ass has exploded a couple of times today. Now, my apartment smells like Isobel’s ass.
- She got two new books today – one in the mail from JDawg’s mom for the martyr day and one from our trip shopping this morning. I got to read a Dr.Seuss book eight times and Chicka Chicka Boom Boom six. I hid it the last time we read. Also, The Going to Bed Book four times. What a nerd she is. She’s totally mine, eh?
- Jill Sobule (remember the Supermodel song from the Clueless soundtrack?) wrote some stuff about me on her newest band’s blog. Feel free to check it out. Please take note of my anal retentive corrections in the comments. Yes, I’m that guy.
- I have 1.5 cigarettes left until I’m done. Hopefully. Nope. DONE. Not gonna do it. I hope I make it at least a day this time and that I’m not too mean to Isobel or JDawg cuz of it – I don’t want to be shitting any chickens but I think poultry will be passed.
- Today one of my ‘friends’ decided to tell me that I should get Isobel checked out for diabetes and/or behavioural problems cuz she’s not a happy kid. This is what I would have said, if she wasn’t as psycho or more so as me: Well thank fucking you for your opinion. When your 3-year old can stop beating the girls half his size and then crying when a baby looks at a toy that’s 10 feet away from him, and you can make it through one god damn single day without hitting him, I’ll take your advice with a grain of salt. Till then, maybe you should spend some fucking time with your own kid, instead of telling me why mine’s broken – all he wants is some goddamn attention.
- Since I make the rules, I’ve implemented the following: once a week, we have a basically veggie or fruit based meal at dinner time. Last week, I steamed up about six different kinds of veggies, there was every colour of the produce dept on a big plate for us to share. And there were two kinds of dips. Yeah. Didn’t like that. Played with it. Tonight was fruit salad with vanilla yogurt and granola. Two bites, then “dahhhh. dahh! No mahhhhhh!” (you speak toddler, right? That was done, done, no more.) She loves vanilla yogurt and granola, so I’m hoping it was cuz the whole exploding ass scenario made her lose her appetite.
- I feel fat. Need to slow down on the craptacular diet. It’s not really doing anything except for making me feel uggish. (Uggish=bloated)
- That doesn’t count the root beer I’m drinking right now. Root beer is like OJ. K, it’s not, but I never drink pop, so there.
- I bought some evening primrose oil today to hopefully clear up the alternating dry/patchy/acne-infested skin I’ve had lately.
- While my ‘friend’ bought three different kinds of diet pills with Ephedra and calcium tablets. She has arthritis. Also, is a genius cuz she didn’t think of the potential interaction between all of the pills and her insulin. Did I mention she’s a diabetic who fasts all day except for daily drinking, candy and fast food?
- I spent $6, her, $210. Mine, three month supply. Hers, four weeks. I’m betting she won’t lose any weight but will fuck up her blood sugar, heart and liver. But you know, what do I know? I’m raising this unhappy child and have only read everything there is to know on the planet about dieting (kind of).
- I am being futuristically bitter tonight – getting into quitting smoking mood, I suppose.
- I cannot make myself finish my work. I have too little motivation. To be responsible, that is. I can read blogs all day long, but work? Nope. Cannot do it.
- Actually, it was kind of funny. Today I cleared out all million and a half posts from my blog feeder and then I was like, what do I do? The concept of Internet surfing outside of links bestowed from the feeds? Totally gone from my head.
- I’ve been a genius myself, lately. I blame this medication. Seriously. Total airhead.
Kay, think I’m done now.
