Everyone at cre8buzz that welcomed me, oh my gosh, I’m in love with you. I’ve gotten so used to the anonymity of blogging and well, the rudeness of day-to-day people that it’s been such a nice shock. And by nice, I mean singing on the top of the mountains Julie Andrews in an apron joy.
This neighbourhood I live in, it has so many pros. The location in relation to shopping, the beach and ocean and parks that surround us, the shopping. Did I mention that I’m so close to downtown, I can go shopping at any time? But you know, sometimes it kills me: this keeping up with the Jones’ ideology down here. If you don’t have money, you act as if you do. If you’re not in a two-parent relationship, you overcompensate by being the supermom. It’s tiring, keeping up the smiles with people you know are just talking about you when you turn your back on them.
Worst of all for me is trying to keep quality friendships because everyone seems so damn focussed on what they’re supposed to be portraying, they miss out on the authenticity that a really good friendship is built on. Everyone’s scrambling to look nice, successful and like a good parent, they forget that they actually somewhere inside want to be that person for themselves.
Maybe it’s Vancouver. I find myself jaded on the city, lately. I was really hoping and looking forward to moving back to the suburbs. I know, big surprise for me, the one who needed to be paid to visit them. But the suburbs have been so developed lately, it’s like being where I am today, without the drama of acting as if.
Do you know what I’m sayin’?
Now, a plan is in effect for Jdawg’s visits to become more sparse. The usual four times a week will drop down to three this week; next week, we’ll just see him on the weekends. And it goes back to that whole acting as if thing, too. I mean, spending time with your kids, it shouldn’t be about the more, the better, because it’s a commentary of your life if you don’t. It should be about you want to, and you can, so you do and it’s wonderful.
I think.
So, maybe I need to re-evaluate this whole moving thing. I’d put it out to pasture. I’d decided that I wasn’t going to make any move because if I did, it would negatively affect something. I felt selfish for considering it. But maybe, I’m selfish for not, you know?
