than me putting zoë in the bath and her being in there for a whole 3 minutes before letting out a huge wack of poop?
me taking her out of the bath to clean it all out, with plans to start bathtime all over again, and then her pissing on the floor while i drain the tub. but wait, there’s more!
then when i go to mop up the puddle, she poops again in the corner of the bathroom. so then i have to drag away this limp child who wants to explore her poop and she’s kicking and screaming and trying to bite me but i successfully deposit her next to the tub, as far away from the poop as possible without taking her out of the bathroom altogether.
then i’m scooping up poop with toilet paper and depositing it in the toilet all the while explaining that poop goes in the potty cuz i’m not pushing her to toilet train this early, but i will use every opportunity possible to emphasize it. and while my back is turned and i’m picking up the last, ugh, piece from the floor, she throws her clothes into the tub.
on to the poop that i still haven’t been able to clean up.
after that, i called a bathtime pre-emption due to bowel overactivity.
