this is a revamp, cuz of the recent post’s issues…no more mrs. nice mommy, i suppose. so…out with the almost-every-post-is-about-zoë cuz yes, she’s my everything, but she’s not me and she can get her own blog soon – cuz this is really supposed to be about me. to me, i mean.
my in-laws were visiting. i am about to kill and skin something, i am so angry…there were fights about dr. daddy not standing up for me and about me being paranoid and about the incessant hugging (don’t touch me if you don’t know me) and the questions that really aren’t for anything more than to appear interested (when they really aren’t and just look away as soon as i open my mouth) and the need to tell me what to feed my baby and the need to shove food into my baby’s mouth (cuz they don’t get to feed her…even though she’d just been feeding herself) and on and on and on.
and just when i was maybe starting to come around, and think, “hey, i’m being too hard on them and they really obviously love zoë,” the following two phrases get busted out:
- in regards to why i’ve changed my hair colour so many times in the past, why i’m never satisfied with it and my retort of thinking i’m not genuinely very attractive, “[dr.daddy] would have no reason to be with you if you weren’t attractive.” i’m glad we cleared up the fact that i am only a nice ride or thing on the shelf and there’s nothing of further substance within, to keep someone near for a six year period.
- when they were saying goodbye and yet another hug was given, to which i responded with a limp double-pat on the back, “you need to smile more. you’re only pretty when you smile.”
okay, so i’m confused.am i pretty and that’s the only reason dr. daddy sticks around (i also make good jambalaya)? or is that i’m only pretty when i’m smiling and i need to smile more? or how about that i’m only pretty when i smile and since the only reason he’s around is that i’m pretty…i must smile an awful lot.
maybe just not very much when my in-laws are visiting*.
* fancy nancy and secret asian man do not count as in-laws**. she’s practically my mum and/or best friend and he’s a constant source of entertainment and knowledge.
** i happen to think they’re both attractive, so of course i like them.
