if you haven’t read this, go on over to binsk’s site because the letter to Proctor & Gamble in regards to Always maxi pads is hilarious. on that note:
i am dying. literally. i finally got the first period since getting pregnant and i think that my body saved up every possible little bit of endometrium that it could. this shit is messy and it hurts and i just wish there was some sort of quick, pain-free vacuum type of thing, to get the whole thing over with.
now that you’re feeling cozy with me…let’s get a little closer. i’ve never really been one of those “not tonight honey, i have my period.” kind of girls. if my bedmate was up for it, so was i. this is largely in part to the fact that that 3-8 day period every 19-37 days was my horniest time. which explains why i could go years without birth control and only end up with one zoë. cuz you know, i had a lot of sex. and that’s like, the apparently safe time.
this is a whole new world. this is the equivalent to baby diarrhea. this is up there with projectile vomiting from above onto my face (don’t ask). this is causing me to want to live in my bathtub, but i won’t since i would just have to clean it at some point afterwards. this is crazy-ass PMS and chocolate cravings and chocolate worshipping and moodiness and barking and communicating with dead people. okay, not that much chocolate.
ugh. point being that i won’t be having sex.
